Why Women Underinvest In Their Most Valuable Asset | School of Becoming

Here’s the truth: too few women don’t invest money in themselves.

I’m not talking about spending on a Louis Vuitton handbag. I’m talking about investing money in things that will make you better, happier, and more connected with yourself. 

We will invest in everything else — our kids, the stock market, real estate, a friend’s business, art — before we invest money in ourselves. 

It’s insane. And it stops now.


There’s a new paradigm to invest your money: in YOU. 

Investing is expending money with the expectation of receiving more in return. You’re either growing or you’re dying, and the only actual asset you have is yourself. So what could possibly guarantee you greater ROI than investing in YOU?


What happens when you invest in yourself is you step into the abundant being you are. Investing in yourself pays dividends, because abundance begets abundance. 

I didn’t understand this at first. In fact, I avoided investing in what I knew needed to grow — a team to help me grow my business. Until one day I was asked to go deep on why I wasn’t making this investment in what I knew I needed.

When I dug in it was because I was afraid to invest in myself. I was afraid I couldn’t sustainably pay a team. I recognized that limiting thought for what it was. And I took the leap and hired.

There’s never been a payment issue. The irony is, my business wasn’t consistently bringing in revenue until I invested in myself through the team I needed! My business grew exponentially as a result, but I had to invest first. When you spend money with intention, the Universe gives you what you desire.

I see women resist investing in themselves all the time. A prime example is the woman who signed up for my Worthy Human Live retreat at the 11th hour. She was hemming and hawing over, I’ve never left my kids for a whole weekend! 

From an outside standpoint, this woman was a successful business owner who had aaaaall her shit together. Yet inside she was full of resistance. Can my husband handle it? Should I really spend this much on myself, when there are so many other things I could put this money to?

She took the leap and said yes to herself, and what she said after the event still makes me cry: “the woman who came here no longer exists.” 

THAT is the transformational power of choosing to invest in YOURSELF. It is night and day. 

You must invest in YOU. Growth is your continuing education.


So why do women have SO MUCH RESISTANCE to investing in ourselves?


Our money hangups come from our grandparents’ generation and the legacy of the Great Depression: a penny saved is a penny earned, save for a rainy day, etc. They were followed by our parents, who swung in the opposite direction of keeping up with the Joneses. 

Our parents’ generation spent money on external things  — the bigger the better. Sadly, this mindset breeds the idea that what you have (house, car, white picket fence, designer clothes) influences how you feel, and how valuable and enough you are.

Both of these paradigms are holding us back. No one wants their gravestone to read she died with a ton of money in savings. Nor do you want your worth and success to be tied to your possessions. Fortunately, we have the opportunity to embrace the new paradigm of investing in ourselves. 


“Who am I to spend money on myself?” 

I’ve heard countless women say this and breaks my heart. If I say to you “invest time, energy, and money for three days with me and you’ll eradicate anxiety, feel better, be crystal-clear on your vision, and leave with phenomenal friendships,” you’ll hedge and doubt yourself into inaction. 

But if I said, “send your kid to me for three days, and they will leave confident, empowered, and with a new group of friends forever,” you would be tripping over each other with your credit cards in hand to sign your kid up. What the actual fuck!?

God forbid you spend money on your own growth. But seventeen extracurriculars for your kids? Of course! You want them to have all they need to be happy and successful! When it comes to making sure everyone else gets what they want, you’re on it! Why don’t you want the same for YOU?

(By the way, investing in your kids without doing the work to heal and expand yourself is useless, so stop. Doing your own growth work is how you help your kids.)

No matter how successful you are or what you’ve achieved, if you don’t prioritize yourself and embrace the paradigm that money needs to be spent on you, you’re holding yourself back.


There’s a part of you that doesn’t believe you can be different. You think “it might have worked for her, but it wouldn’t work for me.” You don’t believe in your own ability to grow and change. Which, ironically, is what investing in yourself will enable you to do: fully love and accept yourself, develop unwavering self-belief, shift your thinking, and raise your consciousness (I am not exaggerating). 

“What if it doesn’t work?” is not really about doubting the program or service you’re investing in. You think it’s “is this program the right investment?” but really, what you’re doubting is YOU. 

You think it’s “too risky.” Because what if you invest the money and don’t change… then you’ll have wasted it! This is another fallacy: there’s no such thing as a waste of money. Every time you invest money you learn something. Every time you are improving the asset of you. Every time you grow. 


The truth is, personal growth work is NOT a luxury. It’s not optional or nice-to-have.

It is an essential, critical component to healing the wounds you’ve never acknowledged. To changing how you see the world, your impact on your children and their children, how you show up in relationships, what you believe about your identity, your money, your purpose.

Investing in yourself is how you not only get the title of a C-suite leader, or build the empire that will make a world-changing impact, but actually feel like her. This is what it means to lead: investing in the growth of you so you can be a beacon and example to others.

There is no bigger ROI than when you choose to invest in yourself. Everything comes out of you: parenting, relationships, money, attitude, beliefs, thinking, impact, EVERYTHING. You are the creator of your own destiny.

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